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Pagmies - "I, for my part, would rather be made from the dust of an alien world than the ether of anyone's heaven" - Shiu Wei, Amorpha

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Fronting (thanks to AnamCara - Rachel, and dedicated to JC of Atropa)

Fronting is a big puzzle to a lot of systems, particularly those that are newly exploring their plurality, because suddenly the person who was primary fronter, the person who fronted almost solely suddenly has to share their life witha  group of people with differing tastes, ideas and styles.
What about the primary fronter?
What about what *I* want?
My life?
I don't want to share my life and friends!
It's actually quite hellish, and totally terrifying to suddenly lose total control, and know that the person people see as "you" could do anything, without you being able to stop them.

We have to work through that to some level at the moment. The person who fronted most is beginning to have to share front time (despite having known about the plurality for a year) and share the life a bit more, and they're finding it hard.
It's not even that they like the life hugely, it's that it's theirs.
One of the biggest steps we took was to write a contract that you had to sign if you wished to front. It left the main fronter a lot more secure about their identity, and that the presentation of the body would remain fairly consistant. Said contract runs to approximately 4000 words, but we need them, because they detail so much.
We also had to tell a few people. Not many, but a few that we spend a lot of our time with. They accepted it, because there was no other option, it explained too much.
We do this gradually, and we have help. A constantly open MS Notepad file for jotting things down, a rather large whiteboard that we can keep track of IRL jobs to be done, and a good bit of inter-system communication. Nothing high-tech.
We want to do this. Life is easier, more full when we are a full group, just remember that it isn't easy, don't jab at systems who can't, and it takes time.

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